Life is sometimes Poo-y

So this has been a pretty heart wrenching and difficult week for me, I have tired to keep busy and my mind off of all the chaos that is going on but sometimes it is just too hard to numb or hide in my mind. I think right now I am not ready to share about it but I will be soon. It is true that family can hurt you the worse. Things have been dredged up from my past and have blared it's evil head at me to deal with it, I suppose it is time although this has been very hard. All I can say is Thank God that I have the relationship with my mother that I do because she has been the one to help me thru all this. I love you dearly mom and I very thankful and blessed you have you in my life.

I will update this weekend...

Tuesday

So guess who has internet at her house again!! WOO HOO!

Oh and I have been soooooo busy so much has happened!

Okay I took a trip up north and saw my prego sis! She is so pretty, her big ol belly and all it's so cute and she is really happy to finally be having a baby...The father is eh. I have my own opinion about him (think he is a total selfish ass and is no way a man but a little child, not worth my sister's time or attention...And that is me being nice) He has no respect for her or anyone else for that matter...She knows it and well there relationship is "roommate" at this point. I am sort of hoping that she takes me up on the offer to move down here with me when the baby is born. :) I would love to have her in the house and my niece!

My car shit out on me :( it is going to cost $1228.00 just to fix the immediate problem...This is not so good. I just paid for my semester at school and already had about $300-$500 dollars worth of books that I didn't know how I was going to pay for. My extra cash has been $0 b/c I haven't watched kids during the summer. :( I wanted to cry today. I can't work and go to school without a car, I can't afford a car payment for a new car, I don't have $1228 to fix my car and I have to decide whether my car is worth putting $1228 into since that is just part of what is wrong with it. quite the predicament I am in. So today was my first (1/2) day without a car. A friend let me borrow her car to drive to work, I took my lunch break when she got off to pick her up, she dropped me back off at work and I bummed a ride with a co-worker home. So it worked out so far. My really good friend Sioux knows all that is going on and she offered her extra car to me for a couple of weeks until I can figure out what the hell I am going to do...I am so grateful to have amazing friends but this whole thing sucks a fat ass. I was really hoping my car would hold out on me another two years...Guess not.

I have been losing weight, woot!

I go back to school in a week :( me no likey that...But oh well, I have MANY more years to come.
I have a camping trip planned for Labor Day Weekend which happens to sort of be my birthday weekend, I am excited for that! It should be fun, I love camping and I will hopefully have 3-4 days off in a row!! Hooray for federal holidays!

My older brother has a stick up his ass lately...Not sure what's going on with that, I think he had some squabble with my mom and older sis and I got caught in the tale of it without knowing. So yeah I hope that he feels guilty for being so mean to me this past weekend when he gets back home and opens his kick ass b-day gift I sent him. (I drove 5 1/2 hours on 45 minutes of sleep and a Starbuck double shot to go see him and my sis but he was a punk so I didn't see him)

My stupid porch light went out again! Arg I just changed the bulb to it a week ago, I think it has a short.

My ex called me again...He still calls me sweety and babe. It makes it sort of uncomfortable knowing that I have moved on and he hasn't, it makes for weird awkward convos and semi-uncomfortable silences when he "happens" to run into me. I think he is lonely again...

I learned that I am more like my mom then I thought, I have a hard time tolerating bullshit from people I am close too. Actually this is sort of hard to explain because I am a really patient, tolerant and understanding person but I don't have time for shit and this is why my circle of friends is much smaller than my circle of acquaintances. In relationships I set a clear truthful ground of what I want and where I am coming from and I don't compromise my standards. I am not apologizing for this BTW. I love myself enough to know I have self worth and am worthy of a certain level of respect and love and I am confident in knowing I will be just fine on my own until I find that other person who is on that same level.

I was glad to find out that my laptop battery was not part of the horrid explosive dell recall. :)

T-mobile is lame, they never gave me the credit on my bill that they promised now I have to spend the time to call them back and complain. boo! Do it right the first time damn it!

I love clean sheets!
It's good to be back home and sleep in my own bed and take a shower in my own clean shower. :)

My dad had another opportunity to prove to me what a douche he is this past weekend. Yep still a douche but I gotta love him cause well he donated the sperm to make me...Leaving it at that.

Oh I went to the fair about a two or three weeks ago and saw Foreigner, surprisingly they rocked the house! I really enjoyed the show...And it only cost me a dollar to see them front row center! Gotta love it!

OhOh and last week I saw in concert Ben Harper and the Innocent criminals! Kelly Slater hopped on stage too with Ben Harper and played a couple of songs ohh and I saw Damian Marley, he was bad ass too! My friend called me up and invited me to go, she was given 4 free tickets and we had fucking AMAZINGLY close prime seats!!! It was a FANTASTIC show, I am officially a life long Ben fan now. "I believe in a better way!" LOL.

Summer has been a blast, I am sad to see it go so soon. :(

I have some amazing people in my life, I am really thankful and blessed. :)

I know that things happen for a reason, I trust that it will all be alright in the end.
What a day it has been...

ADDENDUM

What the hell happened to the WTLounge?;
and can someone tell me WTF is going on with my silly sidebar and why the funky allignment? It won't fix...
Thanks!
:)

Hey a post!

I stole this survey from Elle's blog and squeezed this in at work today :)

1. my roommate and I once: plead the 5th

2. never in my life have I: skydived, I think it is on my list to do before year end ekk!

3. the one person who can drive me nuts, but then can always manage to make me smile is: Any of my family members!

4. high school was: hell, I hated the last two years of it, I had moved to a new city that sucked, was snobby and I did everything I could to avoid school...I ditched so much it was ridiculous, but still got good grades! :)

5. when I'm nervous: I get real quiet

6. the last time I cried was: a couple of weeks ago

7. if I were to get married right now, my bridesmaids/groomsmen would be: no clue, I suppose I am not the norm femme that plans that sort of thing...actually I really don't have any of that stuff planned...I would want my sis in the wedding though.

8. Would you rather run naked through a crowded place or have someone e-mail your deepest secret to all your friends? neither

9. my hair: is really long and starting to get on my nerves, it might be time to chop it all off

10. when I was 5: my parents split, it is also the age of my first real happy memories...go figure

11. last Christmas: was wonderful! I had the best one in a very long time.

12. when I turn my head left: a wall that is horribly painted (I'm at work)

13. I should be: farther in school than I am :(

14. when I look down I see: my keyboard duh!

15. the craziest recent event was: the house party my neighbors had...at least a 100 people, a live band, a small mosh pit, enough beer to fill 5 garbage cans after, and fireworks. :)

16. if I were a character on "friends" I'd be: Monica...I am usually the "mom" and the host

17. by this time next year: I will hopefully be moving outta here and starting at a new college

18. my favorite aunt is: ooo hard to say, I come from a huge family!

19. I have a hard time understanding: math. I hate math.

20. one time at a family gathering: one time, HA! When isn't there something funny or crazy going on at a family function...my family is large and full of life and drama!

21. you know I like you if: I open my home up to you

22. if I won an award, the first person (people) I'd thank: well I suppose it depends on what the award was for, but probably my mom cause she has always been there...

23. take my advice: at your own risk, it may not always be the best advice!

24. my ideal breakfast is: a little bit of everything, just not crepes!

25. if you visit my home town: give my sister a big hug for me, I miss her SOOOO much!

26. sometime soon I plan to visit: my home town...gotta see my sis while she is still prego!

27. if you spend the night at my house: you will have plenty of pillows and blankets

28. I'd stop my wedding if: I am not going there, not going to jinx anything

29. the world could do without: cockroaches and mosquitos

30. I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: umm I am not so sure I would ever lick the belly of a cockroach! That is just friggin nasty!

31. the most recent thing I've bought myself is: mascara

32. the most recent thing someone else bought for me is: a care bear bouncy ball with all kinds of fun toys taped to it :)

33. my favorite blonde is: any of my siblings

34. my favorite brunette is: my friend Siouxsie

35. my car must have a sign on it that reads: rear end me, go ahead DO IT!

36. the last time I was drunk: I drank margaritas and beer

37. the animals I would like to see flying besides birds: pigs...when pigs fly anything can happen right?

38. I shouldn't have been: sleeping in this morning, but I was so tired

39. have you ever shaved your pubic hair? yep

40. last night I: got a call from a friend who couldn't sleep so she came over and watched movies till she fell asleep on my couch

41. there's this girl I know who: needs to get it together and out of her slump

42: I don't know: a lot of things

43. a better name for me would be: none, my name is PERFECT for me :)

44. If I ever go back to school I'll: If!?! more like when...arghh I only have another week before school starts again :(

45. how many days until my birthday?: 25

46. one dead celebrity I wish I'd met is: oh lots of them; Ghandi, Kurt Kobain, Mother Teresa, Ol Blue Eyes, Katherine Hepburn, Richard Pryor, Superman...

47. I've lived at my current address since: it will be two years in January

48. I've been told I look like: someone you know... I get that ALL THE TIME!!! "You look like someone I know...."

49. If I could have any car, it would be: 1967 Mustang

50. if I got a new cat tomorrow, I would name it: no cats, don't like the litter deal...I want a baby turtle, I would name him Sam :)

Update...in my world

Okay so here’s the thing...I share an internet connection with my neighbor. We talked about it and decided that it was pointless for us to both be paying $40.00 per month for an internet connection. We share a kitchen wall (our houses are connected); I let them do laundry (for free) in my washer and dryer and we often share meals when one of us makes a big dinner or something. My neighbors are two boys...one totally hot and I’ve had a crush on since he moved in (he doesn’t know this and his girlfriend is really sweet...so I keep my crush to myself) Both of them are vegetarians like me and we all have a pretty cool relationship. They watch my bunny when I go away sometimes and I let them park in the driveway when they go away sometimes. They are the type of neighbors that are totally chill and we invite each other over for beers or food sometimes. Well anyway back to the internet thing...so we decided that we were wasting our money, we could just run a cable from his box to mine and split the bill. I go out and buy a 50 foot ethernet cable and he says he is going to drill the hole to hook it up. I turn off my internet connection off even though he hasn’t drilled the hole yet because I can still use my laptop and I can bum a Wifi thru there until he hooks us up....well a couple of months pass. He is still being lazy and hasn’t done it; well no biggie for me. I can use my laptop, the desktop can still be used just not for internet related things. Then it happens; I loose connection. Suddenly I have no signal and I am shit out of luck (I wasn’t paying for all those free months either so I was a happy little clam). I think my laptop is on the fritz so I check it out; finally called tech support to fix the problem I created trying to fix the problem...(it’s okay all you techie people can laugh now...I laughed at myself too) But her in is the problem I have no internet at my house anymore! Didn’t realize how much I relied on it and it is causing major hiccups in my schedule. I asked the neighbor to drill the hole and he said he was going to soon but still has not done it. I hate to nag him about it so I might have to give in and turn my internet connection back on. :( Not having internet at my house means I have to check my email at work, I can’t blog like I used to and I have to go to a coffee shop or a library to get a signal on my laptop in order to work; this equates to MUCH less free time and a serious pain in my ass! I think I will have to do something soon so I am so sorry for not blogging, so much has happened too that I want to share! I am well and life is rolling along. (Sugar the "saturday" boy I met turned into a heinous frog so I threw him back :) there will be others...)

A BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY goes to Kathi (glad you liked the card) and Sass (it’s in the mail tomorrow...so it will probably not make it before your b-day sorry dude :( I was too busy to go to the post office this week)
Sorry guys that’s all I got time to squeeze in at work.